


Agent Kansas

by AlwaysTheImpala



Category: Red vs. Blue
Genre: F/M, I honestly was gonna delete this, Nightmares, Song Lyrics, north and york are alive, one of my first fics, reader but in 3rd person??
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-01-03
Updated: 2016-01-02
Packaged: 2018-05-11 07:52:58
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 12,531
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5619331
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AlwaysTheImpala/pseuds/AlwaysTheImpala
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Agent Kansas (reader), of Project Freelancer, goes off the grid. She helps Agent North Dakota go under to. Delta and her fake York's death so he can join their squad. They have wanted to rebel against Project Freelancer since they found out what was really going on. By the time Kansas had gathered York and North the Project already had fallen apart. Now a mission to find Agent Washington and regroup. The story starts out when Kansas, York, and North are on a pelican going to Wash's shipwrecked position in a canyon (takes place in season 11). Kansas (wearing all black armor and a red visor with the standard MARK VI helmet or you can imagine any other helmet) falls asleep while sitting on the ship in full armor.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Let Me Go

**Author's Note:**

> Kansas' "death" place took place on the map complex on halo 4.
> 
> I honestly wrote this a year ago and never have time to finish it so ill be uploading what i have but dont expect too much ~A

It was like her world was falling apart. Every single thing she cared about was gone. York was gone, North was gone, the whole squad was gone. But most importantly he was gone. The only one she could ever trust. Agent Washington. Now she was was clutching his lifeless body close to her. She was sobbing into his bloody amour. "If only i could just tell him, let him know that i love him." That was her worst nightmare, having Wash leave without him knowing what she really feels about him.

"Rise and shine, Kansas." A voice said drawing her from unconscious. The voice sounded sort of familiar, then she felt a kick on her leg. She instantly jumped up and drew her pistol from her thigh holster and pointed it at the person's face. She relaxed when she saw York 's face. York held his hands up in surrender making a surprised face.

"Jesus christ York, how many times do i tell you not to wake me up like that?" Her voice was raspy and dry, but she was so exasperated at the moment, she didn't care. She was waiting for a answer but York didn't reply. She looked at him, seeing he was in his armor without a helmet, she saw him eyeing her gun. She realized a snapped out of the phase of adrenaline and lowered the pistol. He finally cleared his throat when she snapped the M6G Magnum was back into her thigh holster.

"I'm sorry, okay. Were closing in on Wash's position." Great she thought. Agent New York, Agent North Dakota and Agent Kansas have been tracking down Wash. It was easy to track him, but the hard thing is getting to him. They all ran into trouble while trying to get to Washington. They have been trying to reach to him for a couple of months now but haven't been successful. Wash and the Reds and Blues are a pretty hot target. York, North and Kansas have taken out a few other trackers or at least slowed them down. At first the squad want him so he could drop under the radar. York, North and Kansas encountered accidents which almost made them die but they survived, so everyone else thought they were dead.

Kansas was the first to "die". Kansas, Tex, North, Wash, and York were on a mission to recover some important data files from a heavily guarded facility. North and Kansas were partners and were assigned to assassinate the main guards around the facility to clear a pathway. York was solo disarming all of the alarms and unlocking all the doors. Tex and Wash were partners and went to retrieve the files from inside the facility. Everything was running smoothly until alarms started going off. Everything turned red and the alarm was blaring in their ears.

"York, what the hell if this? I though you disarmed all of the alarms?!" Kansas said through the radio.

"I disabled all of the physical alarms in the facility but someone must have set it off technically, like through a computer. Uh guys you might wanna hurry up, we got some big reinforcement on the way."

"Rodger that York, everyone guard me and Wash, we need this file then we can dip. The download is only 65% done. I have the North side of the camp, Wash you take the East side, York take the West, North and Kansas take the South but also give some back up fire to York and Wash." Tex radioed. Kansas signaled to north to move up off the mountain and onto the roof of one of the nearby buildings. He nodded and they got into position, scoping out the building with their snipers. A huge wave of soldiers came in rushing towards the facility in the middle of the camp.

"I got the right side and you take left." She hastily said to north while scoping out the troops. They took out as many troopers as they could until Kansas' sniper jammed. "Damn it. I'm going in." She slid of the roof and crept down the mountain into position. She tried to survive as long as she can on the ground. She ran out of ammo and had to resort to hand-to-hand combat until she got anther gun.

"How much longer Tex? Things are getting a bit messy!" York radioed through.

"It should be done any second now..." There was a few seconds of silence of the radio. "Its done, ok everyone go east and we will escape through the caves, these guys are just going to send more reinforcements if we dont move now!" They all made it to the opening of the cave but thats when Kansas noticed a glimmer of a sniper scope in the distance. She saw it pointed at Wash who was a few yards away. 'No' she thought to herself. She quickly ran to wash to tackle him so none of them would get hit. She only got in front of him then felt a piercing pain through her back. It felt white hot. She dropped to the ground and could hear voices in the distance over the throbbing heart beat in her ear. 

"NO!" she heard Wash yell. He quickly grabbed her of the ground and carried her in his arms to and through the cave. Once she was a reasonable safe place away from the camp she swatted Wash's chest to signal him to let her down.

"You have to leave me-" Kansas choked out.

"NO!" Wash protested.

"Wash please, I'm bleeding out and I'm just slowing you down." She placed a hand over Wash's helmet who was now crouching over her.

"She has a point Wash." Tex insisted.

"No, I'm not leaving you." They could all hear Wash faintly sobbing through his helmet.

"Let me go Wash." Kansas' hand slowly slid off Wash's helmet and on to the floor.

"Kansas...KANSAS!" Wash was now sobbing and resting his head against her helmet while gently shaking her body and murmuring protests for her to wake up.

"Wash come on we got to move, let her go." North voice was calm and subtle, York mumbled a agreement. He slowly got up off Kansas and took one last look at her before leaving. The squad hurried to the pelican with Four-Seven-Niner waiting. They pilled in and took off. Wash was silent the whole ride and didn't say a word. No one else did since they knew now wasn't the time to. Back at the camp, Kansas was on the brink of unconscious she saw troops coming in and surrounding her in the cave. Faint voices were murmuring in the background.

"W-Wash..." She saw a green light a slipped into unconsciousness.


	2. Borderline Good

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> More of Kansas' back story and Kansas, North and York arrive in the canyon.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We are still going to get some back story, as soon as you know whats going on then thats going to be when the plot kicks in. Btw Kansas has two armor abilities- the shield and vision thing. Oh and "HEVS" (drop pods) are like singular drop ships, heres a link to it so you can see what it looks like -  
> http://halo.wikia.com/wiki/Single_Occupant_Exoatmospheric_Insertion_Vehicle
> 
> ~A

"Ok, she is finished." The buzzing had been released from her body. Kansas opened her eyes to find four troopers surrounding her. She was still left in the same spot. Her whole back was numb, she couldn't feel anything on her back. Kansas turned on her voice filter and let out a groan.

"Oh good, he's awake." A cheery voice came out out of what she assumed was the medic. She scanned the cave with her promethean vision and saw there was only two guards at the opening of the cave to the base. 'I can take them.' She thought. Kansas waited until the guards picked her up and started to carry her with their arms draped over her shoulders.

"Wait...i need to sit for a second." She said they quickly let her down. She fell to the ground and coughed up some blood in her helmet but refused to remove it.

"Okay." She said and stood up. She checked to she if all of her knives were in tack and only a few were missing. She grabbed the tiny knife on the back of her thigh a threw it at one of the guards. Repeatedly, she did it for all of the guards. In seconds they were on the floor. She gave a small chuckle and grabbed the knives out of the troopers visor and wiped their blood on their armor. She quickly put them into place and ran out of the cave. When she she was far enough distance she she set up camp on a hill and thought over the whole situation.

'I'm dead to them, maybe i can stalk around the Project for a little bit.' She thought to herself. But she couldn't let Wash live with knowing that you were "dead". She sighed and went with the plan and soon fell asleep. After a few days of stalking Project Freelancer she saw it was corrupt. But the worse part was that the family was spilt up. CT had started it all, then Wyoming, Carolina and South took the Director's side and North, York and Wash were on Tex's side the rebellion. They spilt apart. Before Tex went rouge, North, and South went on a side mission. They had to retrieve some data. 

Kansas looked over them like a shadow. South and him were doing good until anther squad of troopers showed up. Kansas couldn't get a shot on the troopers. They were closing in on them so south took the flash drive out of the computer and pushed North in open positions. South sacrificed him so she could save herself and complete the mission. North was bleeding out and South left the base with the data. Kansas immediately rushed in on North's side.

"Hey North, stay with me, ok? I got you." She was clutching his body in her arms and pulled out her healing unit a set it down near North. She scouted the area and when she got back North was able to walk. The set up camp and she told North everything she knows.

A few weeks later, North and Kansas found York helping Tex on breaking in Wyoming's hideout. Kansas and North arrived just in time. Tex and York were getting outnumbered by the Wyoming's forces. North and Kansas fell into position with York and Tex.

"Kansas?! What the fuck, you're alive?" Kansas cracked a smile behind her helmet and nodded. York was phased by her and just staring. He broke out of it when Tex shouted something about falling back. They were retreating when Wyoming aimed at York, Kansas went in front of him and put up her hard light shield. It was something she scavenged from a abandoned Freelancer Facility.

"I don't ever make the same move twice." Kansas growled. They left the hideout and went to their make-shift base. They were all together until, Tex went rouge and left them a few weeks later. Kansas, North and York were all together trying to regroup with Wash.

"Kansas, were you listening to anything i was saying?" York questioned. She shook her head and York sighed. 

"We are almost there so you might wanna take pilot since your the only one with experience." North said all suited up. York had put his helmet on probably when she was phased in a day dream.

"I only know the basics that Four-Seven-Niner taught me." Kansas slipped into the cockpit. 

"Okay this might be a little bumpy." Kansas turned off auto-pilot and grabbed the stick she pulled up the stick the gain altitude but at the same time they hit turbulence. A explosion could be heard by the back of the plane and alarms started blaring on the plane. The engine blew, there was no way she could stable it.

"Get in your HEVS! We are going down." Kansas ordered they went to the side of the plane where the drop ships were lined up. They opened the pod and went in.

"On my mark. Mark!" Kansas radioed through they all pressed the green drop button and got released into the air. They were rapidly dropping from 13,00 feet (2 miles) in the air. The drop was pretty messy.

"I think I'm going to throw up..." York choked through the radio.

"Well now that the waste disposal in your helmet is off beta, i think you can." Kansas tried to say without laughing in the sentence and North and her started laughing. She used York's own jokes against him. They were dropping fast and soon the clouds cleared you could see the canyon below you.

"I f-fucking hate...you guys." York said. North and Kansas laughed even harder.  
"Ok jokes over, prep for impact." Kansas said. A few second later they smashed into the ground. Dust was filling the air in front of her pod. The reds and blues were now surrounding the drop ships.

"Yay, were saved!" Simmons shouted, along with other reliefs gestures. Wash heard all the commotion and shoved to the crowd to get to the front. He noticed that the drop ships were Project Freelancer property. Wash couldn't see through the ships since it had tinted glass so he cocked his battle rifle. Wash couldn't trust whatever was in the pods. North, York and Kansas were shook up from the hard impact. They pressed the three buttons to release the door. The doors popped open with compressed air hissing through the air. When she was scanning the crowd that when she saw him. Wash was standing a few feet in front of her. She was frozen just standing in front of her pod and staring at Wash.

"Agent Texas?" (You and Texas almost have the same armor) Wash asked and sounded confused. She shook her head.

"Kansas..."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ill probaby try to upload all the chapters tonight, if not you will get them tomorrow but hope u enjoy, btw try not to get ur hopes up cause i will probably abbadon this work. Cheers!  
> ~A


	3. Always On Edge

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The squad gets settled in the canyon

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so plot kicks in this chapter. Btw the way lets just say Kansas had a different helmet during the project but then that got messed up when she almost died so she stole anther one from the UNSC (for the sake of the plot). P.S im trying to portray Kansas as more laid back, not bitchy like Carolina was to the Reds and Blues.  
> ~A

"Kansas..." God, she missed that voice. Kansas quickly nodded, and couldn't suppress the smile spreading on her face. Wash quickly rushed in and wrapped his arms around her, trapping her in a hug.

"Good to have you back." Wash whispered to her.

"You to." Kansas and Wash broke apart. She immediately cocked her battle rifle at the reds and blues that were surrounded her in a half circle and turned on her voice filter.

"Who are you?" York and North were now at her side.

"Hello, i am Michael J. Caboose." Caboose said cheerily.

"Uhh, who the hell are you?" Grif said with a mumbled agreement from Simmons. Kansas growled at the audacity and insubordination. Wash could read Kansas, he knew that she was probably going to beat Grif to death unless he said something.

"This is Agent Kansas. The the purple armored is Agent North Dakota..." Wash started to explain.

"You can just call me North." North interjected.

"The tan armored is Agent New York, also known as York." Wash then introduces the whole squad of the reds and blues. Kansas isn't listening and is more focused on this feeling she can't shake off. Like someone is watching her. She sighs and turns on her promethean vision and scanned the canyon. There. On the far side of the canyon there is two red targets. 'The targets must have a camouflage unit installed in there armor since i can only see them with promethean vision.' She thought to herself. York was talking to Wash about all of them faking there deaths and making copies of their A.I. with Theta and Delta online. York was standing in front of her so she didn't look too obvious she was staring at the stalkers at the top of the canyon. Kansas sighed, 'now we have anther problem, why are so many god damn people following Wash?'.

"Delta, transfer to my HUD." She unplugged her radio so no one else could hear their conversation.

"How may i be of assistance, Agent Kansas." Delta chimed inside her helmet.

"D, i need you to run a ID scan on the targets on my HUD." Kansas tried to ignore all the stares she was getting.

"They are mercenaries, they go by the name Felix and Locus..." Kansas gasped loudly. "Is everything alright, Kansas?" North, Wash and York tried to get closer to her but she just backed up even more.

"Y-yeah D...keep going." She responded hastily.

"They fought fought together in the same squad during the great war. Most of their squad went back to civilization or went rouge. Felix and Locus became mercenaries and do most of their jobs together." 'Yep, thats them' she thought. Felix, Locus and her were all in the same squad during the great war. Then after the war they all became mercs until she got accepted into Project Freelancer. 

"Thanks D." Kansas' mind was exploding with thoughts.

"You're Welcome." Then Delta went back to York, while Kansas plugged in her radio.

"What was that all about." York asked generally confused. Delta was about to supply the real answer but Kansas cut him off.

"Oh my HUD was just bugging out and i needed D to fix it." She still kept her voice filter on since she couldn't risk Felix and Locus finding out who she was. York sighed in disbelief while North and Wash just kept staring at her. The reds and blues went back to talking. Wash walked near.

"Tell me later." He whispered in her ear. She nodded. 

Wash showed Kansas, York and North around the canyon and gave them a place to stay at blue base. Nightfall soon was fading upon the squad. Kansas couldn't sleep with the fact that Felix and Locus were tracking them. She hadn't seen them since she got recruited for Project Freelancer but she knew how dangerous they were and some people in this canyon couldn't protect themselves from them. She got snapped out of her thoughts when someone behind her cleared their throat. She spun around and held a knife to the persons neck. She tensed up until she realized it was Wash. Wash let out a breath he had been holding when she put her knife in the holster.

"We need to talk..." Wash said. Kansas sighed and giggled.

"Why do you have to say it like that?" Wash softly chuckled.

"Turn off your voice filter." Wash knew he needed to hear her voice again, god he missed her so much. Kansas went to make half-hearted protests but Wash just said "Off." She complied.

"When i first went in this canyon i felt like someone was watching us..." Wash nodded. "I scanned the canyon and found two heat signatures. I got D to run a ID scan and found out that they were two mercs named Felix, and Locus. D said they used to fight in the great war together. I made up that lie before since i didn't want to worry the reds and blues." Kansas left out the part that she knows them. She thought it was best for them not to know that so they wont question her loyalty. She heard two pairs of foot steps and spun around a pointed her pistol at a helmetless York and North.

"What the hell is with you guys sneaking up on me?" Kansas bursted out. York went to make a snarky comment but North elbowed him in the chest so he just snorted while North muttered a soft apology.

"What happened before?" North asked calmly. Kansas groaned in frustration since she just had told the whole story to Wash. Wash to this a sign to step in. He gave them both a quick summary of what Kansas said. Once Wash was done they both let out a 'oh' in comprehendment,

"I'll take night watch." Kansas volunteered quickly.

North made protests to take shifts but she immediately shot him down saying that she wasn't really tired anyway. Plus, that they both had a long day. They nodded a little skeptical but agreed, they were probably too tired to argue. Wash, North and York went towards the sleeping quarters which was down the hallway but Kansas stopped them when she shouted out.

"Hey guys, i'm sorry i've been kinda bitchy, its just...i'm really on edge." They all hummed in understandment.

Kansas knew if she feel asleep she would have the nightmares. Everyone soon fell asleep but Kansas. She was pacing back and forth near the window on the top of blue base. She truly was so tired from the eventful day. She sat down in the gap in the wall with her back propped against the edge of the wall. Kansas checked the time in her HUD, it was only 0100 (1 A.M). She was only awake for anther two minutes until sleep ambushed her. She couldn't denie it, her body was drained. She slept peacefully no nightmares,surprisingly, until something shook her from her unconscious. She heard voices. Her eyes fluttered open and she saw Felix and Locus standing over her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hope you enjoyed


	4. Cuz one early morning 'bout zero-five!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Notes- Y/N- your name, Y/E/C- your eye color, Y/H/C- your hair color, Y/H/L- your hair length

Something shook her from her unconscious. She heard voices. Her eyes fluttered open and she saw Felix and Locus standing over her. Kansas was careful not to move or jump but her heart beat was rapidly increasing. She thought she would play it off that she was sleeping. She looked around her HUD and saw it was only 0500 (5 A.m). It was barely light outside, it looked like the sun had barely risen. A voice snapped her out of her thoughts, she tried to listen through the throbbing heart beat in her ears.

"New edition, huh? I like this one." Felix said to Locus while he is crouching down in front of her. God, Kansas missed his voice, she used to sort of have a thing for him back in the day. Felix pulled out a blade and went to put it towards her throat. She was about to snap up before she heard Locus' voice.

"No, Felix. Control wants them alive and we can't take him without alerting the whole base." Kansas almost let out a loud sigh of relief, they still didn't know who she was. Felix groaned loudly in frustration.

"Fine, but let me see the tan and purple one at least."

"No, they will be waking up anytime soon." Locus snapped. Felix sighed and mumbled something along the lines of 'see you later', but Kansas was already slipping into unconscious. The last sight she saw, was Felix and Locus walking away before she blacked out. That's when the usual nightmares came.

Her and Wash were on a high stakes assassination mission. Everything was going fine, it was a simple hit and run. They successfully took down they target and hid the body. Then suddenly alarms were blaring. Kansas was dazed for a couple of seconds. They did everything right, they even took longer proceeders to hide the body.

"KANSAS! Come on lets go, now!" They had been trying to strategically avoid guards so it wouldn't slow them down. They only took down the ones that got in their way. They were almost out, just a few more paces and they were at the LZ. You heard Wash yelp behind you and spun around. South had stabbed Wash in the back and ripped through his spinal cord. Why was South here?

"NO!" Kansas threw a knife at South that landed perfectly between her visor. Wash was on his knees about to fall when Kansas slid down and catched him in her arms. Wash was bleeding out in her arms and she couldn't do anything to save him.she heard his horrible gasps and gurgles on blood.

"Its ok Wash, i'm here." She repeatedly whispered in his ear. She started sobbing frantically into his shoulder. Wash was struggling to say something, Kansas cued him on.

"I-i...love...y-you." Wash choked out.

"I love you too Wash." After the words fell from her mouth his body went limp. His hands slowly slid off her back, dangling towards the ground. 'No, no, no.' Kansas thought in her head. She clutched Wash's lifeless body close to her while she heard the guns cocking of soldiers surrounding her. She didn't care, only one thought was processing through her mind. I couldn't save him.

She awoke with a jump and saw a figure in front of her mimic her reaction. She felt dried up tear-trails down her cheeks. Her vision was blurred for a few seconds but once her vision cleared she saw it was Wash along with York, North, Tucker and Caboose surrounding her. She felt confused about why they were all staring at her, let alone surrounding her.

"Kan, are you ok? You were trashing around a lot in your sleep and were screaming." Wash explained. Her brain was still fuzzy but trued to soak in what happened. That was a first, she never usually screamed. Never. She was told by various reports that she would mumble and shift a little. She would have to leg it out and suffer. Kansas checked the time in her HUD and it was 1100 (11 A.M), she was brought back to the real world when something nudged her in the side of her thigh. She growled at tucker.

"Yeah, I'm good, Wash..." Kansas said in a raspy voice. "Never been better." Kan muttered under her breath. She started to get up and noticed Tucker was frozen, staring at her.

"What the hell is with you?" She barked out, then thats when it hit her. Her voice filter wasn't on. She tried to turn it on but i wasn't going. The screaming short-circuited it.

"Fuck." She said under her breath. York started doubling over, laughing while North, and Wash let out a softly chuckle.

"Oh no Kan, it looks like your secret is out." York mocked her. Kansas tackled York to the ground and pinned him down. She cursed at herself for straddling his crotch and not his stomach. She leaned over a whispered in his ear.

"One secret may be reveled, but i have a ton more." York let out a soft gasp. She got of York with a hop and went to Wash she dragged him by the arm towards the mess hall. Kansas didn't even bother with her voice filter, there was nothing she could do about it. She ignored all the stares that she was getting. Once her and Wash were safely in the mess hall alone, she took off her helmet. She had bright Y/E/C eyes and her Y/H/L Y/H/C was dropping down. Wash missed her so much. Wash clipped his helmet off to revel his short, light blond hair. It was a bit messy from his helmet but that made him more cuter. Her eyes trailed down to his face. It was exactly how she remembered. All his freckles were in the same place. His grey eyes were piercing at her.

"We need to talk. Especially about what happened in the cave." Kansas' voice was dangerously low. Wash sighed, he never wanted to go back to that dark memory. Where his world felt cold and empty. Kansas was waiting for a response while Wash tried to muster up some words. It wasn't that he couldnt find anything to say, actually it was the complete opposite. Wash had so many things he needed to tell her but he couldn't find where to start.

"I just wanted- uhh... I c-couldn't..." Wash couldn't form a coherent sentence and he felt heat rushing up to his cheeks. He tried to hide it but it was almost impossible to do with his fairly pale skin. He just did what he always wanted to do. He suddenly pushed Kansas against the wall and clashed their mouths together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is probably such trash


	5. In Good Hands

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> sooo it kinda gets heated in this chpt. hope u like ~a

Kansas didn’t know where it had come from. One minute Wash was a flustered, stuttering mess; the next he had backed her up against the wall, mouths pressed together as they kissed. Kansas could feel Wash firmly against him and it was making her feel lightheaded and a bunch of other things she didn’t care to name right now.

What the fuck was happening and why the hell hadn’t he done it sooner?

Kansas groaned as Wash nibbled at her lower lip. He was making trail of kisses down her jaw, to her neck. Wash sucked at her pulse point, causing her to make a strangled noise in her throat while bucking her hips. She was running her finger wildly through his hair. Wash groaned at the needed friction, he was sucking lightly so that it would leave a small mark. 

"Just marking what's mine." He growled before leaving a deep red mark on the skin behind her ear. Wash was letting out all the jealousy he had when Kansas was on top of York. Wash's possessiveness was making a heat coil in her stomach. Wash pulled back to catch his breath before attacking her neck and face. He was placing kisses on the corner of her mouth and leaving marks inti her neck that would stay there for days, maybe even weeks.

"Come on, Wash we aren't doing any talking." Kansas made half-hearted protests while trying to pry Wash off her neck. Finally, after a few minutes of tugging he detached himself from her neck. Wash trying to catch his breath with a lopsided grin.

"What's so funny, Agent Washington?" Wash growled, his erection was already strained on his cod piece. That was one of his kinks, Kansas calling him by his full title.

"Don't tease me." Wash growled with something a bit darker in his eyes. Kansas couldn't stand the heat of his gaze so she just looked towards the floor. She honestly couldn't form any words. Luckily, Wash spoke up.

"I didn't want you to leave me, especially without you knowing what i really feel. Knowing how much i love you."

"I love you too, Wash." Kansas lent in for a quick kiss on the lips. She rested her forehead against his and they were both slightly panting. They heard shuffling down the hallway. Kansas immediately clipped back in her helmet, she didn't need Tucker and Caboose hearing her voice let alone seeing her face. Wash copied her actions. Thank god, it was only North and York who passed through the doors.

"Am i interrupting something?" York asked to Wash and Kansas who where standing close together. Kansas nodded while Wash just hummed an no.

"Hey Kan, wanna tell us why you were screaming and trashing around?" North said smoothly. Kansas always wondered how he could do that? Remain calm during everything, especially when all hell breaks loose. She honestly loved his voice, it calmed her down.

"Uhh not really..." They all glared at her. "Ok fine- every single night i get nightmares, ever since that day in the cave. Every single person i ever cared about dies in my hands, and i-i...can't do a damn single thing. I just have to leg it out until i wake up. You guys.." She gestured towards North and York. "...usually tell me that i fidget a lot and mumble somethings, but i have never screamed until last night." She trailed off. Kansas was debating on telling them about last night with Felix and Locus. She sighed, more on edge they will be but they needed to know. "Oh and guys there is something else to..." Wash, York and North immediately looked at her. "When i fell asleep on watch last night around 0100, i woke around up at 0500 and saw Felix and Locus standing over me..." They all muttered statements of concerns. "I'm fine guys really, but it looks like they were just scouting us out. Luckily, they only went near me, they thought i was still sleeping but i was ready if i needed to take them down."

"Kansas why didn't you tell us about this before?" York said in concern, while North hummed in agreement.

"You guys couldn't have done anything about it, and i didn't any more stress." Kansas looked down at they floor and shrugged. "I don't usually sleep at night." Wash was soaking this in.

"Ok Kan, ill take watch with you then..." Wash spoke out. "If you fall asleep, then i can wake you if you'd like." Kansas nodded. It would be good time for her and Wash to catch up.  
____________

Nightfall had come quickly. Kansas was tired. Tucker was making all sexual comments towards her the whole day. She had kept telling him off but god, that kid was consistent. Caboose was just honestly confused with the whole situation and kept asking her if she was a mean lady like all the rest of the ladies. That actually was the good part of her day since Caboose always made her laugh. He may have some issues but he was a down-to-heart good kid and he was so innocent. North is always concerned about Caboose, while York finds amusement and confusion. They settled okay with the sim troopers.

Kansas and Wash made post where she was on watch last night. They both sat on either ends of the opened-wall with their backs propped up. They talked about good memories while in the Project until they both were to tired to talk. Kansas did a quick scan of the canyon with her promethean vision. No Felix or Locus. 'Huh, strange' she thought. She just brushed it off.

"Hey, Wash?" Kansas's voice filter was stabilized now and she had turned it on since Felix and Locus could be anywhere.

"Hmmm?" Wash hummed out while his head was slowly dripping to his shoulder. It was only 2300.

"You can go to sleep in the quarters, i have this, don't worry. I'm not as tired as last night." Kansas said soothingly. Wash just jolted awake by that statement.

"No I'm totally fine, it's just quiet." It was in the middle of summer on Chorus. The crickets were chiming while lighting bugs were lighting up the dark sky with the stars. It was clear so clear tonight, you could see every star shining down on you and Chorus' two moons in close orbit.

"Ok, i can sing you a song? Mhm, i know the perfect one, my mom used to sing it to me every night when I couldn't sleep." Wash just hummed.

"Mm dooby do, dahm dahm, dahm do dahm ooby do  
Dahm dahm, dahm do dahm, ooby do  
Dahm dahm, dahm do dahm, ooby do  
Dahm dahm, dahm ooh dahm  
Mm dooby do

I want, want you to kno-o-ow  
I love, I love you so  
Please hold, hold me so tight  
All through, all through the night..

I've waited, waited so long  
For your kisses and your love  
Please come, come to me  
From up, from up above

I need, need you so much  
Wanna feel your wa-arm touch

Mm dooby do, dahm dahm, dahm do dahm ooby do

Dahm dahm, dahm do dahm, ooby do  
Dahm dahm, dahm do dahm, ooby do  
Dahm dahm, dahm ooh dahm

Mm dooby do, dahm dahm, dahm do dahm ooby do  
Dahm dahm, dahm do dahm, ooby do  
Dahm dahm, dahm do dahm, ooby do  
Dahm dahm, dahm ooh dahm"

Kansas looked at Wash and heard his breathing even out. Kansas sighed. There was no point of moving him to his bed since he was in his armor. So she just let him be, he needed the rest. 

____________

Felix had saw that Agent Washington and Agent Kansas had taken watch. Locus had went back to the Federal base since they had a late meeting. Felix just snuck out of the New Republic. He had hacked into their radios and was eavesdropping on the conversation. He hadn't gotten any useful information, other then stories from back in Project Freelancer and that Washington was bored. Felix snorted at that. He was suspicious of this other solider called 'Agent Knasas'. He didn't sit with him and something seemed all to familiar about him.They would see him practicing throwing knives at trees. Felix was pretty impressed since one time Tucker bet him 50 bucks that she couldn't hit a tree all the way from the other side of the canyon. That distance was about 65 yards and she hit it. 

Felix and Locus were impressed like everyone else in the canyon while Tucker shouted something along the lines of 'Dude you have to teach me that!' And Kansas just shrugged it off. Felix was good with knives but not that good. Only a 'god' could do something like that. He used to know one. He shook his head, not letting those thoughts come into mind. He needed to let go of her, but he couldn't.

He distracted himself with listening to the conversation. Until he heard him sing. 'What the fuck?' Felix thought. He knows only one person who would sing that. Y/N. She would always hum that tune when she was working and when she was trying to sooth or calm down Felix. 'But it couldn't be her.' Felix thought. He pushed it off and would tell Locus tomorrow. He listened to the steady tone and tried to imagine it was Y/N with him, rolling her soothing fingers through his hair. Once, the singing stopped he looked over the boulder he was behind. Wash was still so that meant he was probably asleep and Kansas was just looking around. 

Felix thought there wouldn't be much more information passed by so he headed back to the New Republic base. His thoughts were wandering about her. Felix refused to admit he was in love with her. Love was for the weak. Besides she left them anyways. Felix couldn't stop his dreams for imaging them together, working side by side.


	6. Weakness to Us

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok so Kansas doesn't have her file specifying her gender. It only has a picture of her amour. and the little line thingys are time skips ~a

"Locus? You know that Agent that is a fucking god with knives, well last night, when i was scouting him and Wash out, he so happened to sing that exact same song Y/N would always sing around us, don't you think that's a little odd?" Felix said, then changed his tone into seriousness. "Do you think its her?" Felix lets his voice linger.

"Felix it is very unlikely seeing how there is many Freelancers. It appears that you don't understand, unfortunately, she is not coming back."

"But she could be using a voice filter for all we know." Felix tries.

"Felix, let her go. She is a weakness to us all." Locus' tone drips at the end fading off. He notices Felix gazing off and being strangely quiet. He assumed he was consumed in his thoughts. "Focus, we are attacking the canyon in less than a half of hour." Locus said and walked out.

____________

"Who the fuck are these guys?!" Tucker shouted, while Caboose blindly lead himself in the middle of the battlefield. Wash yelled at freckles to cover caboose.

"Fuck this." Tucker said while firing a shot and hitting one of them right in the jugular.

"Wait, we don't know who they are!" Wash shouted. This whole situation was bizarre.

"They're the guys who are going to kill us if we dont kill them first."

"Tucker is right, Wash, we need to make a move now. Although, they do have crappy aim." Kansas interjected. Wash had made freckles take them out. "Everyone stay on guard, there could be more." Everyone was throughly confused. Kansas scanned the area with her promethean vision and saw a sniper in camo.

"Sniper! Get the hell down!" She shouted in through her voice filter. The shot was fired before she could do anything. It was headed straight for Wash when Felix had jumped in front of him with his hard-light shield yelling 'run'. The next shot hit him in this leg while he cursed. Kansas was so confused. If they were working together why did Locus just shot Felix in the leg? Was it a act? Simmons was confused while Felix growled at them to run. Her heart dropped she heard that voice. God she missed it so much.

"Excellent work, soldiers..." Locus appeared a few feet away from them. "You killed my men. I suppose that makes you the real deal." Simmons said something about being confused while Locus snapped at them. "Quiet, all of you, come with me." Wash shared a glance with all the freelancers.

"And why would we do that?" York muttered in agreement. Kansas was still trying to analyzed this situation. It was probably a act since Locus and Felix aren't that low.

"Because if you don't come now then i will have to take you later." Locus demanded. His voice still sent shivers up her spine. Kansas leaned over and whispered in his ear that this was a act and not to tell them anything.

"Fuck off." Felix spat.

"You shut your mouth, and be glad i missed your head."

"Oh my god, you are such a douche bag." Tucker agreed.

"This is your last chance." Locus warned.

"Freckles." Wash shouted as Freckles fired missals at Locus. She knew Locus would get away. Once he was gone Caboose was demanding a explanation since his helmet was broken.

"Uh, do any of you know how to patch up a leg?" Felix questioned.

"I'll go get some orange juice." Doc said out if no where while running towards red base.

"Wait, that's a thing?" Felix questioned. Kansas chuckled, he sounded innocent and confused. It was adorable. 'No Kansas' she mentally scolded herself. She couldn't have any feelings towards him.

"How about we get you to somewhere less open? Uhh, wanna help me out ,York?" They both nodded. Felix took the hand she was offering him. God, i felt good to touch him again. She pulled him up and let his arm sling around her shoulder while he did the same with York. She kept a steady hand on his hip and lower back to support him. They directed him towards a spot with rock covering one side. Doc came back and healed him up.

"Uh, I can't feel my toes." Felix questioned with concern. Donut just said it was normal but Felix didn't seem convinced.

"Don't worry, it's happened to me before, just try not to out to much unnecessary pressure on it and I'm sure you will be fine." Kansas said reassuringly. Wash immediately put a gun in Felix's face while Felix was surprised.

"You need to start talking."

"Hmm aggressive, paranoid and a little melodramatic. You must be Agent Washington." Tucker laughed at 'melodramatic'. "And that means the rest of you are the reds and blues. But, uh, who the hell are you guys?" Kansas growled. 

"We are the ones asking questions not you." Felix was going on a rant how they're the best soldiers ever. Yeah, this definitely was a act. Felix would never be this low, plus he could probably take on most of the reds and blues.

"Stop giving him information. What's your name?" 'Good play, Wash' Kansas thought.

"Felix."

"Ok Felix, what are you doing here?" Kansas hated foreplay in this situation, they needed to get to the point. She pointed her pistol at him.

"We need answers now. Everyone else shut the hell up and don't give him any information. We still don't know if we can trust him." The reds and blues murmured in agreement.

"Seriously, who the fuck are-" she cocked her gun. "Ok.." He explained the whole civil war story. Kansas was disappointed, they could have done better. Someone probably wants this stupid rock of a planet for a big sum of money if the mercs were going through this trouble. Felix had said he wanted them to fight with them.

"Hold it, are you ok to walk, Felix?" He nodded. "Ok, lets gets inside the base so we can't get taken down by snipers like last time." They all moved into the blue base while sharing a few comments. Tucker and Wash had disagreed to fight in the war.

"No im a freelancer..." Guns cocked. "No, no i mean a mercenary, you know a gun for hire."  
Kansas was sure that they had a bigger picture, Felix would never be something this small.

"We will just tale that ride out of here." Wash declared. Felix had radioed to his command at the rebel base.

"So what now?" 

"Now we make this the most defendable hole in the ground the universe has ever seen." Felix commanded.

"Why?"

"Because we are about to get hit, hard. I need a detailed list of the supplies you have got on hand. Set up choke point and mark protein sniper nests." Felix described.

"Woah, woah, woah, slow down. We're not telling you anything. We still don't even know if we can believe you." Wash countered.

"Well believe this, if we don't prepare for a fight, we might as well be waiting for a massacre." Wash turned towards her to see what she thought.

"Ok, York, North set up sniper nests, Reds build a arsenal, Tucker fix Caboose's helmet..."

"Yes! Thank you nice lady!" Kansas froze.

"Uhh, did he just call you 'nice lady'?" Felix questioned.

"He uses me to replace someone." She tried to answer as clear as she could. "Felix and Wash we aren't done talking."


	7. Back in Black

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okie dokie, major dialogue for the next couple chapters.

"So how bad is this?" Wash questioned.

"The man coming for us is named Locus. He's a merc like me, only...you know...terrifying." Felix did sound convincing.

"Locus?" Wash was confused. Everyone else was doing their jobs in the canyon.

"Yeah, the guys so far of the deep end, he prefers to go by the name of his armor instead of the name her was born with." Felix whistles.

"That's unsettling." 

"Oh are you first name Agent, last name Washington? Thats so weird." Felix sarcastically said. Kansas almost giggled at that. Felix could always up hold his humor.

"That's just old habits." Wash explained.

"Well, hears to hoping those old habits of yours kick in when he shows up... You know i thought there was less of you."

"Stop trying to pry us for information." Kansas demand. She was staying quiet for most of the conversation, letting Wash take the lead.

"Sesh, what's your problem?" Felix sounded offended.

"My problem is that you show up in our canyon, scattered with shipwrecked soldiers, bring us into the middle of a civil war that we have no place in even to start! Also, you are a biased source that's subtlety trying to pull information from us! Mercs are hired to help their clients at all costs!" Kansas yelled, she was fed up. She wanted to rant even more but couldn't risk short-circuiting her filter.

"What are you talking about, Kan?" Wash asked confused. Kanas growled, glaring at Wash.

"Kan? As in, Kansas? Holy shit, you must be Agent Kansas. But how? The data base says your dead." Felix asked.

"Ask anymore questions, you'll be dead before you can put your shield online." Wash and Felix were talking about the cloaking device Locus had and the type of technology they had.

"...happen to have any high tech armor aboard, would ya?"

"Plenty of armor, but nothing out of the ordinary."

"Wash! What the hell do you think your doing?" Kansas yelled.

"Come on Kansas he seems okay, loosen up." Kansas relaxed her shoulders and sighed. She didn't want anyone to get hurt. Felix was probably getting suspicious of her so she decided to calm down as much she could. Wash didn't get it. She told Wash they were mercs, he probably brought the story Felix was selling.

"Well at least you can accessorize, huh? maybe try a little color combo mixing up? I-im sorry I'm just trying to brighten the mood." God damn it, how was she supposed to be mad at him if he was being so adorable. 'No' she thought, he is a threat.

"Actually, i think i might indulge in those old habits you were talking about. Follow me."

"Man, you are just cryptic, like all the time. Do you realize that?" Kansas and Wash trudged forward while Felix sprinted to catch up with them. They walked towards the ship besides each other. Kansas was in the middle of them, keeping a eye on Felix, to see if he did anything sketchy. She knew him inside and out, they had been working together as mercs for 2 and half years until she got recruited. She picked up a few things along the way through the ship, like spike grenades, ammunition.

"So, Kansas? How did you drop out of the grid?" Felix risked asking curiously. She sighed, there was no danger in giving this information now since the project is destroyed.

"Me, Wash and a few other freelancers were on a mission to acquire data from a insurrectionists camp. Things got messy at the end. We were trying to fall back through a cave to get to the LZ but i caught a glimpse of a sniper and took the shot for Wash. My squad carried me about a quarter mile through the cave when i told them to set me down. I told them to leave me, that I'm just slowing them down..." Wash winced behind his helmet remembering the day like it was yesterday.

"...After a few minutes i slipped into unconscious. They must of left me cause i barely opened my eyes and saw soldiers surrounding me with a green light, then it was lights out. I woke up in the same spot in the cave, i took all of the guards out and escaped. I watched over my friends in the project like a shadow, and even saved some of them when they were about to die." Felix nodded, he was trying to soak in all this information.

"What did you do before Freelancer?" Felix prodded on.

"I think that's enough." Kansas scolded. They walked towards the room with all of the spray paint cans. Wash picked up the steel one and she nodded. She knew what Wash wanted. She had the steadiest hands so she did the edges around the yellow accents. Once she was done she let Felix and Wash do the rest while she scavenged the ship for anymore equipment. She only found a few spike grenades and some alien cubes. When she got back she saw they had only got the leg pieces done. She groaned.

"Can you guys go any slower?" She grabbed the can from Felix and started spraying. Once she was done she let the paint dry.  
____________

 

"Well it just goes to show, with a little time, effort and elbow grease. We can really achieve wonders." Donut said cheerly. Everyone but Kansas, Wash and Felix were all gathered together.

"We spent hours turning this place into a war zone and you made me hate it in one sentence." Tucker groaned out. They were all exhausted and the fight hadn't even started.

"It's what he does." Grit complains. Donut always did seems to have a cheery attitude.

"Ugh, i hate you guys." York groaned out. North nudged him with his elbow.

"York, be nice." North said threateningly low. York would be surprised if that didn't jolt arousal into him. Wash, Kansas and Felix returned to the rest of the group. The were impressed with how the canyon was transformed. They heard gunshots from the other side of the canyon. Everyone prepped their guns.

"No this isn't right, Locus wouldn't attack like this." Felix informed.

"Dos.0 cease fire! No mas! No mas!" Sarge was yelling while running away from a Spanish speaking robot.

"Deadly force authorized." Freckles said.

"Wait! Everyone calm down!" Wash yelled. Everything was happening so fast. Kansas tried to keep on guard for the real enemy.

"Shit!" Felix ran in front of Wash and blocked a bullet with his shield.

"Surrender now, and i promise only to kill the mercenary." Locus appeared out of his cloaking device.

"Yeah? You and what army?" Grif questioned.

"The federal army of Chorus." A bunch of Locus' men started to uncloak behind him. There weren't that many but they probably had snipers shadowing the area and men on their way towards the canyon.

"Well guess i walked right into that one." Grif commented.

"Looks like backup isn't getting here in time." Felix growled

"Uhh, guys whats the plan." They hummed in agreement to Tuckers question.

"Stay close." Kansas growled. Then they all cocked there guns and started firing.


	8. Never Leave Him

"Get to cover." The reds managed to take out a warthog. While everyone else was returning fire. Freckles was losing in that stupid battle with the other robot. That pink guy went over towards the other robot while they covered him. No on knew what the hell he was doing.

"Alright, thats enough. Dont make me hurt you." The pink solider warned to the anonymous robot. It started speaking Spanish towards him, which no one understood. He threw a cubed nade with the robot across the canyon. 

"Get out of the tank!" Felix yelled to Sarge and Simmons. Locus had stuck a grenade onto it. Doughnut had apparently took care of the Spanish robot and started tossing grenades at the enemy. There was so much commotion on.

"Felix, wheres that back up?!" Wash yell.

"I dont know!"

"Wash we might have a problem." Wash went towards Simmons to figure out the problem. Kansas soon fell completely out of ammo and didn't want to risk taking ammo from other soldiers.

"Ugh, North and York cover my six." Kansas commanded while she went out towards the soldiers. They were hiding behind rocks so she grabbed her akimbo katanas she kept at her back. She immediately took out a least ten of them. Until Locus shot at her. Luckily, she was quick and pulled her shield online before the bullet hit her. She fell back since they had reinforcements coming through.

"Felix, we are a man down, where is that back up?" Wash demanded.

"I dont know, they should be here in a few minutes." Felix replied. Kansas was more than aggravated by him. They might die since of this little act.

"We don't have a few minutes. If we can't get freckles online we won't stand a chance."

"Such bullshit." Tucker ran across the canyon towards red base. Kansas saw him so she went after him. He didn't have much of a success rate. She sniped countless cloaked soldiers that would have killed Tucker. 

"Fuck you, Basebook. Thanks, Kansas." Tucker said while he slashed at the computer at red base. Kansas turned off her voice filter and offered a 'your welcome' towards him. She thought Tucker was a good solider compared to the rest of the people in this canyon.

"Freeze! You and your friends have caused us a lot of trouble." A guard said behind them. Kansas grabbed her knife and ricocheted her knife of the wall into the visor of the guard.

"Dude seriously, i will pay anything, just one lesson!" Tucker bargained, she blushed and let out a giggle.

"Alright, everyone together now we can do this!" Wash yelled next to North.

"No, you can't." Locus said while firing a blast of his rail gun at Wash and North. They both dropped to the ground.

"Wash! North!" Kansas screamed with Tucker, York and Lopez near her. Sniper took out Lopez while Kansas blocked the next shots with her shield."Stay behind me Tucker!" She snapped with her voice filter. She and Tucker got to a rock for cover. Sarge got blasted with the rail gun to. Freckles got took out by a missile. This was Kansas' worst nightmare. All the sudden, they heard a big blast. They hear shouting 'For the New Republic' and tons of soldiers coming out.

"There here, that's our backup." The new republic soldiers took out a few feds and freckles managed to take out the warthog while severally damaged. "Get to the caves, we gotta go!" Locus took out three soldiers. "Theres no time, get out of here!" Felix shouted while he blocked shots from Locus. Tucker and Kansas were near the opening of the cave. Felix, Caboose, Grif, Simmons and York ran by her. She didn't risk running through a hot zone if ammunition but when she saw Wash get up she went to get him but York held her back. North was crouching behind Wash trying to stay conscious.

"YORK! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?! LET ME GO, I HAVE TO HELP HIM." She screamed. She couldn't leave Wash. Not a second time. 

"We gotta seal this tunnel!" Felix growled.

"Freckles! Shake!"

"NO! WASH! NORTH!" The entrance of the tunnel collapsed.

____________

Kansas was slipping through consciousness. She could she the sky through a hole in rock. She tried to move around and felt a hand on her right arm.

"He's waking up." She heard a unfamiliar voice say.

"Woah easy, you've been knocked out for a while now. Just take it easy, theres nothing to worry about. You're safe, Kansas." Her head was spinning and she could barely hear Felix over the throbbing in her ears. She could barely see. She could make out Felix standing in front of her and anther person.

"Hey Kan, dont worry. Im here." She turned her head to the other side of the bed and saw York resting a hand on her fore arm. Or what she thought was York. It was really hard to understand anything in her condition.

"W-wash..." Kansas rasped. "N-north. Felix..." Something about the way he said his name made Felix tingle inside. He was straight after all but, there was something different about this guy.

"Take it easy. We are not going anywhere, ok?" Felix calmed.

"Yeah Kan, you got hit pretty hard. Just rest." Before she knew it she was slipping into unconsciousness.

-(TIME SKIP TO 15 MINS LATER)-

"Shes waking up again." She heard someone say. She could hear more clearly now although her vision was a little fuzzy.

"Hey Kansas, how you feeling?" York questioned. He was still had his hand wrapped around her fore arm tightly.

"Ugh, fine..." She groaned out.

"You took a rock to the back of the head, good news is, we made it back to base, undetected." Felix informed.

"Back to base?" She questioned.

"Welcome to the New Republic."

"Felix, York where the hell is everyone?"

"Grif, Simmons and Caboose are up at the main compound."

"What about everyone else, Wash, North?" The lady who she assumed was a medic left.

"We had to leave them, Kansas-" York said behind her. It all returned to her. York was holding her back in the cave while Wash and North were on the battlefield. She wanted to help them but York held her back. She left Wash for a second time.

"Look the feds were closing in, if we would have stayed any longer they would have taken you to." Felix explained. God, he is cute but she was pissed at him in ten different ways.

"No! You don't make the calls for me!" Kansas yelled. She immediately regretted it since she felt lightheaded now.

"That's war, Kansas! Not everyone makes it back. You guys put up a good fight, i could see why Kimball wants you."

"Who the hell is Kimball?"

"I am, Vanessa Kimball, leader of the New Republic and very glad to meet you. I wish it were under better circumstances."

"Uh, yeah...sure" Her brain was still fried. She wished she could form a sentence. She grabbed York's fore arm reassuringly.

"Your friends are waiting for you up at the mess hall. It's just North of here, why don't you go catch up, we'll talk later."

"Yeah, uh sure." York lead her out, holding her since she still was a little dizzy. The walked down to the mess hall through the new republic base.

"Its a small rebel army, Grif." Simmons screeched.

"It's poor customer service." Grif complied.

"You were eating everything."

"Im a emotional eater what can i say"

"Can you two shut the fuck up?" Tucker yelled. The two of the never stopped arguing.

"Agent York, Agent Kansas?" Caboose questioned when he saw them walking towards them. She turned off her voice filter.

"Hey guys."

"Wait, what the fuck? Your a girl?" Grif screeched. Simmons seemed to box up more and be suddenly quiet.

"I would totally punch you in the face if i felt better, but I figured, if we are going to be put in this situation, why not know all of it..." They all gave her confused looks. "Felix and Locus are mercenaries-"

"Yeah we know that."

"Grif, i swear to god if you interrupt me one more time, I can't be responsible for what I'm going to do to you." York just gave her a confused look. She just shrugged, she was still a little out if it. "Just listen, ok? Felix and Locus are with a third party. They are just acting to be mercs for the armies. Im guessing they have a bigger picture and wanna wipe this planet out for a big sum of cash."

"Why?" Simmons questioned.

"I don't know, maybe someone wants this stupid little rock of a planet. Oh and dont tell Felix about this. He doesn't know I'm a girl and he never will.... What happened to you guys?" She questioned. Simmons explained the whole story to her and York.

"Hey, somethings come up." Felix said on a cliff above them.


	9. Training Camp

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> song lyrics in this chapter, kinda just slopping this together since im in a rush to get this out btw its one of my first fan fics ~a

Kimball had assigned them privates. York and Kansas were the overall leaders but they all were captains. They got to chose who their second command was. She thought the reds and blues recruited the privates that reflects on their personality. Kansas personally chose private Paxton because he looked like he could listen to orders. He did although liked to mess around. York had choose Private Gage as his second in command, he was a good soldier from the standards but was very much like York.

They had to train and practice in order to get back Wash and the rest of the group. Kansas had started a heated argument with Felix since she wanted to go out with just her and York but Felix wouldn't let her. They both were capable but the rest of the reds and blues wasn't. She didn't want to risk their lives but them Felix had said the same thing to her. That York and her were a "valuable assets" and couldn't "risk their lives". Kansas stood down since their was no way he was going to let her escape. She could tell that he had eyes on her 24/7.

The reds and blues trained together. It was like hell. Kansas tried to be patient like North but everything these guys bothered her. Especially the other privates, they were even more inexperienced.

After a couple days of getting no where, they have finally settled a deal that if the reds and blues were able to take down Felix without Kansas' and York's help the could go save their friends. It was so infuriating that she was bring held back since other soldiers couldn't carry their own. They only had a few days left a she hoped to god that they would be ready or they can sneak out.

____________

 

It had been a long day of training, nightfall had already come. They were running out of time to save their friends. A few of the privates thought it would be nice for everyone to relax around a camp fire and sing songs. Kansas didn't want to go at first but York dragged her along.

"Come on Kan, it will be fun." He said while dragging Kansas by her hand towards the bonfire. They had a lot of people around. There was a space for two on a log. Kansas sat with York on her right and Tucker on her left, Felix was sitting next to Kimball across the small fire talking to her about something. Caboose was sitting next to Tucker and Simmons and Grif were sitting next to each other. All the privates were near each other. Everyone else had their helmets off, besides her and Felix.

"Uhhh...anyone know who to play guitar?" A private said, Kan thought his name was Palomo, then again she had a hard time remembering names. Everyone looked around at each other expecting someone to make a move. No one else said anything so she quickly spook up.

"Yeah, i can." She said with her voice filter in tact. Her voice sounded believable actually, it made her sound like a young guy. Everyone gave her weird looks while they passed the guitar around. Felix was still staring at her while she tuned the guitar. She was debating on what song to sing but then it finally came to her. Hopefully this didn't seem to obvious but this song was sort of about her and Felix's relationship. "Some of us can relate to this song." She said while starting to strum to instrument.

"Wise men say only fools rush in  
but I can't help falling in love with you  
Shall I stay  
would it be a sin  
If I can't help falling in love with you"

 

Everyone seemed to relax when they heard the tune. Her mom would sing this around the house so she remembers all the lyrics. She would consistently keep looking to Felix while her eyes scanned the crowd. Felix was just staring at her. She shakes her head down, ignoring his gaze while a blush spreads across her face. She hoped that Felix didn't figure it out. They have had a few close encounters. Kansas did want to send a message through this song towards him, slightly hoping he would get it.

"Like a river flows surely to the sea  
Darling so it goes  
some things are meant to be  
take my hand, take my whole life too  
for I can't help falling in love with you"

Felix's mind was wondering. "Some of us can relate."? What the fuck thats sopposed to mean. Kansas just seemed so familiar to him but now this song? Felix was almost sure it was her but how? He needed to tell Locus about this or find it out by himself. And to top it off he consistently kept looking back at him, like he was pointing it towards him.

It was just anther freezing night. Their contract had them stationed at a fucking planet made ice. They had poor heating in their base so that often meant you had to freeze at night. Control didn't send enough blankets in and now they just had to stick with one blanket. Y/N could not fall asleep, she keep shifting in her bed. She hoped that Locus and Felix didn't wake of because of her. After all, they did have separate beds in the same room. Anther shiver went down her spine. She hated this weather, it was bothering her. Y/N was too consumed in her thoughts she hadn't seen Felix get up from his bed. Once the bed dipped she was aware.

"Felix...what are you doing?" She questioned.

"We both cant sleep since it is so fucking cold so i thought we would improvise. Now we have two blankets and can share body heat." Felix explained as her climbed behind her and shuffled into the blankets. It did help a lot, Felix was like a heater, his heat was seeping into her skin. It felt so good so she pressed back until she was firmly pressed against him. Felix hummed and wrapped a arm around her waist. It did take long for Y/N to fall asleep.

"Goodnight, Y/N..." Felix whispered while he raked a strand of her hair behind her ear. Y/N was dripping into sleep be she barely could hear him say "i love you."

 

"Like a river flows surely to the sea  
Darling so it goes  
some things are meant to be  
take my hand, take my whole life too  
for I can't help falling in love with you  
for I can't help falling in love with you"

Felix's heart warmed at the thought. He would never forget that night. But what if Locus was right? What if she is a weakness? Felix is guessing that Kansas is her but what if he's wrong? He stored his thoughts for later and listened to the song, but he couldn't help listen to the lyrics. Did Y/N want him back? Felix didn't know, his head hurt from all the thoughts. He snapped back in to reality when he finished the last few lyrics, but now the tone he sung it in was completely different. It was like she was sad or in deep thought. Felix was beyond confused, there was two totally different tones in the song.

After she finished the last strum and roar of cheer came around the bond fire. She blushed when comments along the lines 'that was amazing!' were muttered. She looked towards Felix and he gave her a nod. She sent one back and could feel the glow of his smirk behind his helmet. Once the crowd has quieted down Tucker spoke up.

"That was great and all but can we have something not as depressing?" Tucker questioned. Kansas laughed. She actually laughed, Tucker had no idea.

"Ok, any requests or do you want me to pick one?" Some other soldiers just mumbled among themselves. Kansas did express her feeling through the song that she picked and she wanted to pick one relating about her a Wash's relationship but chose not to. Kan just picked a Blink 182 song. She started tuning the strings again to match to songs tune and saw Felix staring at her again. It was making her a little uneasy. She pushed it aside any started strumming the strings.

The song wasn't that meaningful, it was just a tune to make the soldiers happy during this civil war charade. Many of them were chatting or relaxing. The whole environment was just very warm and it made Kansas drop her guard. Even with Felix around, it felt like they way it used to. She forgot about all her problems, about Wash and Locus, she just was thinking about Felix, singing and the guitar. She quickly finished that song.

"Ok guys, i think I'm done." Kansas said while placing the guitar down and getting up. She instantly got pleas to stay and play one more song. "Ok one more, and thats it." Everyone else vigorously nodded while Felix just nodded slowly. She sighed. This was going to be a risky one.

"My lover's got humour  
She's the giggle at a funeral  
Knows everybody's disapproval  
I should've worshipped her sooner

If the heavens ever did speak  
She's the last true mouthpiece  
Every Sunday's getting more bleak  
A fresh poison each week"

The group relaxed into the calming tune. Besides Felix, he seemed to do the exact opposite, he tensed up. She hoped that she didn't give it away, but at the same time she wanted Felix to know. Her thoughts were racing at this point. She decided to look at someone other than Felix. She scanned the crowd and took in the faces of the soldiers. Many of them were very young especially her private (Paxton) who was sitting with the rest of the other privates. She hated that lives were being wasted in this act of war. But then it kept her thinking. Was Felix a different person than she used to knew him as. 'God damn it, i can never keep my mind off him' she thought.

""We were born sick, you heard them say it

My church offers no absolutes  
She tells me, Worship in the bedroom.  
The only heaven I'll be sent to  
Is when I'm alone with you

I was born sick  
But I love it  
Command me to be well  
Aaay. Amen. Amen. Amen."

She didn't even know if thats the same Felix she loved. 'No you like Wash.' She scolded herself. She dared to look at Felix and say him staring at her with his head crooked to the side. What was he trying to say? Kansas shook her head and tried to finish the song quickly so she could get away from Felix's burning gaze.

"Take me to church  
I'll worship like a dog at the shrine of your lies  
I'll tell you my sins and you can sharpen your knife  
Offer me that deathless death  
Good God, let me give you my life

If I'm a pagan of the good times  
My lover's the sunlight  
To keep the Goddess on my side  
She demands a sacrifice"

Her thoughts quickly switched to Wash. She still couldn't believe they had been separated again after everything. Wash could be hurt at the feds base. Or he might not even have made it out. She shivered at that idea, Wash was probably fine, he's gotten through a lot worse. She just wanted to be with him, but she also wanted to be with Felix. She needed to make a decision soon or things might get pretty bad.

"Drain the whole sea  
Get something shiny  
Something meaty for the main course  
That's a fine-looking high horse  
What you got in the stable?  
We've a lot of starving faithful

That looks tasty  
That looks plenty  
This is hungry work"

All this was just heavy. You know with Felix, Locus, Wash and this whole civil war. She wondered what hell of a pay check they would get at the end of this, even if there is a end. She just wanted to spend at least some more time with the one guy that she had been searching for years. That kind of implies to both Wash and Felix. Yikes. This was getting really choppy.

"Take me to church  
I'll worship like a dog at the shrine of your lies  
I'll tell you my sins so you can sharpen your knife  
Offer me my deathless death  
Good God, let me give you my life

No Masters or Kings  
When the Ritual begins  
There is no sweeter innocence than our gentle sin"

Kansas hoped Felix didn't recognize this tune to. She would always hum this around them. Even sometimes as a lullaby to them, since they said her voice calmed them down. She had done the same thing with Wash. Why did they have to get separated? Well, at least she had York, the only person that would keep her sane. York could be a asshole, but he was like her brother and they both messes with each other a lot. She mostly teases him about his ever lasting crush on North. It was cute.

"In the madness and soil of that sad earthly scene  
Only then I am human  
Only then I am clean  
Ooh oh. Amen. Amen. Amen.

Take me to church  
I'll worship like a dog at the shrine of your lies  
I'll tell you my sins and you can sharpen your knife  
Offer me that deathless death  
Good God, let me give you my life"

She quickly finished the song and left out one of the lines. As she strummed the last note a roar of applause came. She blushed and thanked everyone. Some people were cheering for more but she denied them. She needed to get away from Felix at the moment so she put the guitar down carefully and walked away.

**Author's Note:**

> yo spot the next chapter


End file.
